Zombies (and 2 short stories).

I love zombie movies. I watch too many of them, and sometimes I have nightmares about them. One nightmare terrified me to the point of waking up in a cold sweat and made me afraid of falling back to sleep. But once I told Chris about the nightmare, he couldn’t stop laughing about it, and neither can I.

I just had to write this because it involves food.

Skip this story if you’re not into zombie movies or gore or have a weak stomach.

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Story one – The Nightmare

In my nightmare, Chris and I are living in a world full of zombies. As we’re boarding up the windows of our warehouse (we always agreed that if we had to choose a place to live, it would be a Costco’s, Sam’s Club, Super-Walmart or BJ’s because they have everything we need – explanation for another time) and letting in humans, my brother calls up, still non-zombie-ish.

Brother: “Yea…my friends and I are still human, and we’re gonna come over after we go eat first.”

Me: “But it’s dangerous out there! You should really just come over now. I don’t think you should eat.”

Brother: “No it’ll be fine. We’re hungry.”

Hours later in the dream, my brother and his friends don’t show up. I call him and he’s mumbling.

Brother: “Yea…all my friends got eaten by zombies. I got bitten so I can’t come over now.”

If you watch zombie movies, and you know my brother….then you might find this funny.

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Story two – Why can’t we just eat the zombies?

After watching a zombie movie with my in-laws a couple weeks ago, we had a long discussion with my father-in-law about how to survive in a post-apocalyptic zombie world.

FIL: “If I had to find food, I’ll just build a giant wooden plank (?) that reaches to the next roof over, and take the neighbor’s food.

Chris: “But sooner or later THEY’LL run out of food too!”

FIL: “……..what if we just eat the zombies?”

Me: “You want to eat zombies?”

FIL: “Well there’s so many of them, and they’re just walking around.”

I’ll just end the story here. It just ended with a lot of discussion on how meat goes bad when not properly handled to ensure freshness.